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8.06.2008

Too Much Loyalty?

Soo... this post over at Pass No Judgment (shouts out to D.Riz) got me thinking about loyalty.

I just want to put this out there: I'm a loyal person. I've discussed this at length already, but... yeah.. I just am. That's it. But I do draw the line somewhere -- you don't get unlimited loyalty minutes from me.

The point of the post over at PNJ is basically: no matter what, support those close to you. If your friend is in a situation and needs support, do that. Chastise them later, in private, if they were wrong, but put up a face of support and loyalty in public, first. And I agree with that. Wholeheartedly. I have supported, explained away, and even encouraged some DUMB things my friends have done, but because that's what they wanted to do, or because they were in a sticky situation, I did it. I had a friend in high school who was just crazy. I mean, looking back on it, she was crazy on a level our young high school minds weren't ready to understand. And the things she did took real manipulation, time and effort. But I backed her up to the outsiders. I would co-sign on stupid stuff all the time because that's how I am. Behind the scenes, though, I was giving her the "what for" but to the public, what she said, was what I said... and that can get you into a little trouble.

Where I drew the line then and draw the line now is at how I feel about a person. I'm more than happy to avoid discussing a person you may have issues with or may not like, with you, but I'm not going to end our relationship SIMPLY because you don't like them. Now, if they wrong you in a way that makes me feel like I need to take some action, I will -- but just a "I don't like that chick..." isn't gonna cut it and sometimes I feel like that's the type of loyalty points people want to have. Sorry. Not gonna do it. I can respect your opinions, but your opinions, are not my opinions, period. I also don't think it makes me a bad friend because all of your enemies aren't mine. Like I said, major infractions are different (she stole your man, is different from she called you out on some mess in public. The former will get you harmed, the latter might get a laugh out of me if it was funny enough)...

I make my own decisions about who I like and dislike. Sometimes I can explain it, sometimes I can't. I don't expect anyone to dislike anyone else simply because of me. That would be ridiculous.

2 comments:

One Man’s Opinion said...

Thank you. It amazes me how so many people allow who they will and will not like be influenced by other people. It happens a whole hell of a lot on the police department. I refuse to let people make my decisions on who I will and will not like. That's madness.
I'm like you...I will respect the fact that you don't like this person and will not flaunt a friendship in front of you, but I make my own decisions in life, damn it!

No Judgement Passed said...

Big ups! Glad I could help to stimulate some good conversation.

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