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11.02.2008

Confusion


I'm confused.

I could pretty much end my post right there, but then what would be the point?

Problem 1:
It has been my plan for almost a year now, to attend grad school in the Fall of '09 to get my Master's degree in School Counseling. The plan was to get my life together and get re-amped to be in school (I so needed a break from class). I also needed to work -- cause a sista got school loans. Since I was little I've wanted to be a Senator. This was always my goal. Then I got older, learned more about myself and our political system and realized that I wouldn't make a good politician. I speak my mind too much -- I think there is right and wrong and rarely middle ground on that. The political world is ALL about the gray areas. I'm not good with the gray areas. We need to talk yes or not, black and white, 1 or 2. I decided to take a job offer in a Senator's office to finally decide if the political scene was really not for me. In the last month, I had begun to wonder if I didn't enjoy the legislative end of politics and if I couldn't stay on the job a little longer than another year.
Then I asked my mom, who I was most afraid of disappointing by not going to grad school next fall what she would say if I told her I was considering staying in politics. Her response? "I always knew you would..." Nobody knows me (as much as I HATE to admit this) as well as my mom. And for her to tell me she felt all along I'd end up in politics has only made me think harder about something I had been trying not to consider.
If I want to go anywhere in politics, have any real future and make any real connections, I need to stay. And though I wouldn't start grad school classes for another year and wouldn't have to quit my job for another two years, these are decisions I can't make until the first quarter of 2009, and by then any hopes I would have to get an application in in time to get in to a school for the Fall '09 will be shot. So I have to decide now...

Problem 2:
Ok... I don't actually think I'm even ready to talk about my other problem. But I guess I can boil it down to one question...
Is it always the better choice to speak your mind? Even when not asked what your thoughts are?

1 comment:

freemanpress said...

Extra schooling will always better your position in politics. I say get the advanced degree because a couple of years will not stop your true destiny. But you probably will never have any time to go back to school once you start on your big goal.

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