STFU and have a coke and a smile

In an e-mail, a guy I know, laid out the following scenario:
He and his family were invited to a friend's party where, it turns out, the husband had invited most of the males and his wife most, if not all, of the females. Many of the men there (but not my friend, not that it matters, just a point of clarification) were black men who brought their non-black girlfriends. Many of the black women there made their disapproval very much known and made many of the interracial couples uncomfortable -- this became very obvious when one couple left early. My friend pulled the host to the side and asked him about it, at which point the host revealed that the women were his wife's friends and that he was upset with their attitude as well.

Three things get me heated about this story.

1) Check your friends at the door. We all know our friends temperaments (and if you don't, reconsider that friend status). I know which of my friends would be like these women and if I invited them to my place (which, let me say, their invitation would not be guaranteed) where I knew interracial couples would be there, they would most definitely get that little kid in the car conversation. We all know it, the one where your mom shuts the car off and turns around very slowly and says "If you embarrass me when we get inside this house/store/church, etc... I will wear your behind out when we get home..." and my friends know how I am about stuff like that so they would know to check all that madness quickly. And if they didn't, best believe I would embarrass the SHIT out of them for being so ignorant. There is a place and time for ignorance and best believe I expect folks to know it.

2) Where was the husband? If my boyfriend and I threw a party together and his guests were disrespecting my guests, if I didn't feel it was my place to call them out, I would go straight to him and PLEASE believe that if he didn't do anything, I surely would call them out myself.

3) If I go to an event with my boyfriend that he was invited to, and he is the only person I know, and other guests start making rude comments about the two of us together, I do expect him to say something to somebody and if he doesn't, understand the type of REAL issue we'll have as soon as I get him in the car. I'm really not one to make a scene, because there is a way to say everything to everybody -- but I would make my opinions known to somebody.

I don't want to be disrespected, I don't want my friends disrespected, I don't want folks I've welcomed into my house disrespected -- whatever I have to do to keep that level, that's what needs to be done, in my opinion...

Now, the fact that these women were upset about a black man with a non-black woman in 2008, damn near 2009 is a WHOLE other issue, that I'm not sure I even want to address because I think that's dumb. Why can't people just say "it's your thing, it's not my thing, and that's fine..." I think it's fine if as an individual you don't approve of interracial dating, but last I checked, that was nobody's issue but your own and your issues need to stay with you in your world. The end on that.

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