Is This New Slang?

I went on a hiatus for a minute. You can read some about it here -- I may do a post on what it was all about.

Last night was my first evening "plugged back in." I was on the phone, texting, checking facebook, on twitter, etc... Of course I had a lot of texts to return and one was to a male friend of mine. We'll call him Jared.

My background with Jared is... umm... not easy to explain. But we've never dated and never slept together. For all intents and purposes we're just friends. ::blink, blink::

Right before my technological unplug, I learned he'd gotten a new phone and was looking for numbers. I text him my number and he never responded.

When I turned my phone back on, his text was one of the first I got. It was simple "Hey Ash. How are you?"

When I text him back, I pre-empted the obvious question by telling him I'd had my phone off for a few days and I was sorry for missing his text. "Too many dudes calling?" he asked.

We went back and forth for awhile before he sent me a random one that just said "kiss, kiss"


In one of our previous conversations he said something jokingly about coming to visit, so I asked him about it.

Me: So when are you coming up to DC to visit?
Jared: Idk. You got half on a ticket?
Me: ::blink, blink::

My BFF wouldn't ask me to pay for half of his ticket to DC to visit. And though this isn't about chivalry or men/women roles, I'll add that he (my BFF) would offer to pay for my ticket/pay for my ticket if I asked.

But the crickets came from a place of trying to understand why I would even consider paying for half his ticket.

Because I really want you to come?
Because I owe you?
Because -- well, that's all I got.

After playing a couple of rounds on Mario Kart, I decided to respond with "I'm moving back home soon -- gotta save for that..."

"Ok," he said.

And like all our other convos, that was the end of that. Awkward, huh?

But as I've shared that short portion of our exchange with people, I've started to feel more and more "some type of way" about it.

Like why would you ask me that, in the first place. No, really?

One of my friends tells me I over-analyze things. I don't agree -- I just like knowing why people do what they do. It's what get's me in trouble because I press people. I don't want your prepped answer, I want the real and most times the only way to get the real is through subversive tactics.

So, I legitimately entertain foolishness, searching for "the bottom." I'll have to be honest, I rarely find it -- but that doesn't stop my search.

But there's an implication to a question like that that I struggle to put my finger on and I think that's what's got me feeling "some type of way." Maybe, just maybe, I have some ideal of how things should progress with us, if they're going to progress at all (in this moment, I don't care so much about progression as much as process(ion)) and maybe I think the way he seems to be trying to progress is indicative of some unacceptable assumptions.

Assumptions like he can have something that he can't.

Or that I'm a typer of person that I'm not.

Am I being vague and euphemsitic enough for you?

Anyway, as usual, I'm just processing all this, so I'll update you if I come up with something concrete.


Reads4Pleasure said...

So basically he thought there was a chance that you were feeling you him like he's sorta kinda feeling you AND chances are some other chicks have financed his road trips before so he thought he'd feel you out & see if you were like them.

A.Smith said...

@Reads4Pleasure - Yeah, something like that. Or maybe he just wanted to see how far he could get with me... which seems to be the name of his game anyway. ::shrug::

I do not understand people.

Kit (Letters To A Young Sista) said...

I noticed you basically disappeared after doing the post at Macon's. Well, we all need a break, but you left with a bang and it was a great post.

I'm not sure what to think about BFF. People tend to keep unspoken debits and credits in their heads in any relationship. If he's done a lot for you over the months or years, and more than you have for him, his wanting you'll pay half the travel fare shouldn't be a big deal, especially since he's your platonic friend (I'm guessing) and not a boyfriend or one of those friends with benefits where you've been giving up the benefits.

But if you've been more generous over time than he has, well, he might a broke as shit and/or have a character problem. If the score is even, you might want to keep it even. Just some thoughts...

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