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9.17.2008

Brain vs Heart: Two sides of the same coin

Thoughts of a Southern Gal over at "One Good Reason for Doing the Right Thing Today, is Tomorrow." just put up a post asking how to deal with matters of the heart.

Our mind and our heart... what we want vs. what we need. An age old issue, especially in the realm of life and love. That internal struggle, I think, is a universal one and definitely the hardest. How do we balance our emotions with being realistic and practical.

You love someone and you know they're bad for you in every way. How do you deal with that?

One thing's for sure, no one way is any more correct than another. I finally learned what was good for me. In a past post, I said
And I do miss the good times, but having been through so many bad times, I realize this was inevitable and I'm proud of myself for finally saying enough is enough. I'm okay with missing it. I'm okay with wishing I had it back.
I came to a point in my situation where I decided I had to accept what was happening. I also had to accept that I had done all I could do and that if I tried to do anything else I was putting my own emotional well-being at an even greater risk. In short, I realized I needed to do what was best for me. But in doing what was best for me, I had to muddle around in my feelings and I also realized that ignoring being upset, being sad, missing him and the good times, hating the situation, etc... wasn't working. Not only was it an immature way to deal with those feelings but it was completely stopping me from moving on.

A guy I know, raps in one of his songs, "looking back on the past will keep me at a stand still and that's exactly why the rearview is smaller than the windshield." A very on-point thought, but I can't help but ponder that when you're driving, there's a point where things aren't in your windshield's view, nor in your rearview mirror. They're right beside you. It's the present. It's the here and now. And unless you deal with today, today, you'll be dealing with it in your windshield forever.

But once you've accepted it. Accepted that it happened, accepted how you feel about that and moved on -- then let it be in the rearview mirror. Let it be the past. We learn from the past and it's good to review sometimes, but you can't dwell on what you can't change and we all know that the past is absolutely something we can't change.

One more thing...

I firmly believe that we go through things for a reason and I also believe that life tests us before it teaches the lesson. So if you don't learn your lesson the first time, you'll keep finding yourself in the same situations over and over. So deal with the present today so that you don't have to dwell on the past, tomorrow.

2 comments:

One Man’s Opinion said...

I too believe that things happen for a reason. This is a good post. I think it is hella hard to let go of the past, but we have to if we ever want to grow.

Thoughts of a Southern gal said...

I don't know how I missed this post yesterday. Very good post. I needed to read it.

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