My Family

I'll start with my father, because this will be easy:

My father is... umm... you know, I actually think that aside from the whole abandoning me thing, my father is a good guy. Really. I have a hard time imagining that my mom would've fallen all in love with him if he didn't have somebody's positive characteristics. And there are things about myself that I don't see in my mom and I just know I had to get from him -- and I think those things are good.

However, unfortunately the script he's written in my life is one of subpar activity. He's been non-present, non-active, non-supportive. He's, unfortunately, been the stereotypical black father. I guess, though, it's hard to be present for every child when you have 9 by different women (yes, that was a low blow... I get to take a few cheap shots).

There are days I'm so angry at him, days where I don't care and days where I want to reach out to him. I don't know what the future holds, but right now, today, he's going to have to make that first move.



As I grow older, my appreciation and love for my mother only grows. When I was younger she used to talk about her late mother with such awe. I used to love to hear her reminisce just to hear her talk that way -- but I'm getting to a point where I completely understand that. My mother is awesome. Strong, smart, beautiful... everything I pray God will allow me to grow up to be one day.

She was a single parent. Ya'll gathered that. It's not easy being a single parent. Ya'll knew that.

When I was a freshman in high school, my mom quit her job and went back to school. Everyone told her she was crazy. She had a child, in private school no less, to support. But she did it anyway and she now has a degree in nutrition and massage therapy. This story has been a jumping off point for many essays I've had to write about myself and my background. I didn't get it at the time, but the more I come to understand exactly what it took to go back to school at 45 the more I understand that "strength" isn't the word for it.

I am who I am because of God and because of my mother. Whatever you could want to know about the type of woman she is, you can see it in me.